How do you get over feeling depressed or low? It can feel at the time like a mountain to climb but it does not have to be. With these 10 Steps to getting over feeling depressed, you can transform how your life is feeling.
There are many reasons why we don’t feel happy. When it’s just one day then of course it does not matter. When it drags on though or some kind of major change happens in your life then you really can end up feeling depressed.
Remember, it may be right that you are down. Your relationship may be unhappy, you may have trouble with money, you may just be frustrated that you have not achieved what you want and do not know-how. It is ok. You feel down but you do not have to stay that way.
Feeling Depressed is a Downward Spiral
Feeling low or depressed is a downward spiral. Some say you have to hit rock bottom before you can bounce back but part of my mission at Team Super Dad is to ensure men do not have to hit rock bottom before that can happen.
This works for women too by the way!
I actually wrote this in response to a post on Facebook, which read…
“I am feeling so low .. I try and keep upbeat, go for walks, jogs w the kids and keep active but I am just heartbroken.. 23 years down the drain. I keep wondering how did I end up here, what should I have done more, what could I have done more.. I just keep crying in secret so kids can’t see it.. trying to keep it together in btw home schooling and working myself.. sorry for the depressing post”
10 Steps To Getting Over Feeling Depressed
- Get fit – literally, sweat out the sadness and toxic stress and replace with feel-good hormones and energy.
- Vision for your future – create one. Get excited about it. Work out where the gaps are and start to focus on fixing them.
- Get connected with your Fab Four – I tell my Team Super Dad members and dad coaching client this. Make a list of 4 people. Tell each of them that you are struggling and can you count on them at this time. Then you will not feel like you are calling the same person all the time and that they all know you need them. Game changer. Make one of them at least the opposite sex and ideally have experienced what you have and moved on.
- Do something new – whatever it is, something new will have your brain come up with new thoughts and ideas. Literally re-conditioning your mind. I joined a singing choir.
- Counselling – it was fab in the end but took three awful ones before I found one that was a good fit for me. I saw Julie for 18 months. I basically had to unravel a whole lot of crap going back to my Mum dying and other childhood incidents that were holding me back from being a balanced husband and happy Dad.
- Anti-depressants – you may be depressed. Speaking to your Dr will help you work this out. Do not take them long term. I got very wise about what I was taking and decided upfront that I would work on myself so they were the medicine they needed to be and not a long term crutch. I took cetaloprham for 10 months up to 40mg at one point. At 8 months I started to come off them. The last bit takes a leap of faith because you may fear the depressing thoughts will come back. It is a weird feeling for a couple of weeks but just make the jump.
- Play the long game. You should be upset right now. It is OK. Be reassured though with the right focus and energy it will get better. I couldn’t bare to be without my kids and cried alone. Now I have them 50/50 and make the most of every second, with and without them.
- Positive media, music and energy – you know what they say about only hearing love songs when you break up?! Well, make sure it doesn’t. Listen to feel-good music. Watch rom coms, sitcoms and adventure movies. Do not watch the news. None of these things offer you anything at the moment. Put YouTube on and search ‘motivation’ ‘inspiring’ ‘leadership’ ‘success’ ‘happiness’.
- Dating Apps – one for people who have had a breakup or are already single. Consider staying off them until you feel confident. It is soul-destroying swiping, swiping, hoping, hoping. Just avoid until you can take it as something fun.
- Find ways to laugh and have fun. Seems obvious to say when life looks so upside down and miserable. But force it! Make it happen. Keep looking for opportunities to laugh, relax and be with people who help you feel happy. And btw….you can actually make yourself laugh. Your brain does not realise the difference. Just stand in front of a mirror and laugh. Do all kinds. Be silly. Laugh out loud. Bring the sunshine to you. It works
Rev TD Jakes has a video where he says “Do not drown in a cup of water”.
Make sure you are moving forward.
Keep going to keep growing is what I tell all my Team Super Dad Group – Dad Success Group members and Dad coaching clients.